Day 11 - Reality Setting In.

So, I think I am at the point in my recovery where I'm realizing, HOLY COW, what have we done. It takes all the effort in the world to do the smallest things, and my left leg is rapidly shrinking. My thigh has not been this thin since high school, which ordinarily would be a source of joy, but it's because the muscles have left the building. I will be honest - I am possibly a little on the vain side and this is causing a panic. Am I going to turn into biscuit dough before this is all done? I know it will come back but I just need to accept it's going to get worse before it gets better. My recovery is going ahead of schedule and I need to find gratitude for that and that I WILL get better - this is just temporary. To make myself feel better I am doing as many ab and upper body exercises as I can - as long as I don't turn into one of those guys that overdoes the upper body and then has spaghetti legs all is well. You know who I am talking about.

So lets talk about the good stuff. The swelling is getting better - there are some big lumps but overall I think it's looking pretty good. I'm really impressed that the bruising is minimal. That's pretty awesome.

I always hated exercise bikes, but since that's all I can really do it's my favorite part of my rehab. I am only cleared for 10 minutes and I don't want to overdo it, so right now I am dying to get on the bike but will probably save it for later. I listen to my little iPod with my running playlist, full of super-hard angry rock music. Since I am riding at a snails pace for 10 minutes, that music may be overkill. I think I will make a new playlist and fill it with softer, more appropriate music. Or maybe I won't.



 I don't know if you can read the stats on that baby, but I go about 2-3 miles an hour for 10 minutes, for a grand total of one half mile. And it's absolutely amazing I can get my knees to allow the rotation on the bike at this stage - my PT says most people just do half-circles back and forth for weeks. This whole process is making me a little tired of being so hard on myself. It's a little exhausting - maybe that is the bigger lesson I am supposed to get out of this.

Thanks for reading - this whole journey is definitely not all puppies and butterflies, but my goal in sharing it was to give a realistic view of what happens during the process. Prior to my surgery, there were many blogs that were great resources to me - I hope that someone stumbles upon mine one day so I can give a little something back.

Enough cheesiness- I am getting on my bike. Tool playlist and all. Have a beautiful Saturday.

4/21/11 - First Day of Physical Therapy!

I started physical therapy today and was so ready - I don't sit still very well and have been itching to find out what I can (and can't) do. I also learned that as I suspected, 120 degrees in the CPM machine is very different than that range of motion out of it. I already have some of my hyperextension back in my surgery knee, which is great news. I wanted it to at least somewhat match the other, and I would look funny with one bendy knee and one tight one. I have about 3 degrees now and would like for it to stay that low. I can bend to 95 degrees on the surgery leg. Sounds great, right? However, with my flexibility I have a little more ground to make up. My non-injured leg is at 5 degrees hyperextension and 145 flexion. But I'm in a good place for now.

I am approved to do straight leg lifts and hamstring sets, which are hard! Because I'm so mobile already, she is focusing on my hamstrings first - later she will work on my quads. The quads extend and stretch the ACL, so we don't want those getting too crazy - the hamstrings balance them out and stabilize the ACL. I finally felt today for the first time that my hamstring is missing a little something. I can do the leg lifts in all directions except for the one that focuses on inner thigh work. My hamstrings are not able to stabilize my knee, so my lower leg drags and bends to the side. Gross.

I also got to get on the bike today! I am not winning any races, but I could make full rotations. It felt incredibly good to move - I really think that not moving causes me more discomfort than the surgery. Now if I can just find a way to be comfy when I sleep - having this giant thing is not a good sleep aid. I tried to roll over onto my side a couple of nights ago and it did not go well - my hubby found this hilarious to witness.

So for now, I will do 10 minutes on the bike, and my leg lifts and hammie sets 3x a day. Thank goodness I love my physical therapist, because Lord knows we are going to be spending a LOT of time together.

Getting ready!

Tomorrow is the big day! I am still a little anxious but there is plenty to do in the meantime to keep me busy. And if I was thinking about maybe postponing it (and I was), that thought was eradicated when my knee slipped out cleaning my mat after PureBarre this morning. Fine, fine - I will go!

There are so many things to remember before I go in tomorrow morning. Tonight we will get the couch all ready, as well as the recliner (that might be better to sleep in the first few days). I'll have to take off my nail polish (boo!) so they can check my nailbeds to make sure I'm getting enough oxygen during surgery. No food or drink after midnight tonight - then tomorrow morning, no makeup (again, so they can check my color), no lotion (so that all the little sticky monitors will adhere to my skin), no deodorant.

The surgery is at 9:15, but we will get to the hospital 2 hours early. They'll check me in, and move me to a pre-op area where they will start an IV. Because I confessed to the anesthesia nurse that I am a little anxious, they will probably give me something to relax me at that time as opposed to right before they take me in. I hope so, because otherwise I am going to be tempted to make a run for it.

I will most likely have general anesthesia, and they will harvest a section of my hamstring to make the new ACL. They'll drill tunnels into my tibia and femur to thread the new "ligament" through, and secure it with screws. If he has to replace my PCL like he thinks, they will use a cadaver tendon to do that. The whole thing should take about 2.5 hours. As soon as I am awake, they are going to have me start working to straighten my leg - they are sending me home with a CPM (Continuous Passive Motion) machine that I will start using that day. I'll put my leg into it for several hours while it just bends and straightens it for me. I will have crutches but they want me to start trying to put weight on my leg as soon as I can. The more active I am the better my healing will be - so I am all for that! They'll also send me home with a machine that goes around my knee and will circulate ice around it. This is all pretty high tech - so I am happy that I waited to have my surgery! All of these things will help my comfort as well as my healing, so I feel very lucky to have access to them.

I'll probably be pretty out of it tomorrow but if I can update this I will - it might not make any sense. I will also be busy making Mark wait on me hand and foot while I do the opposite of what he tells me to do. I am sure he can't wait!